August 1, 2006 - A rant.... OMG!!!

Still not a lot new around MO. I am finding ways to pass the time between MotoGP races. It's hard to be creative with my time-passing projects. I am most adept at staring at shiny objects and drooling, but, as it turns out, the general public is not overly receptive of people who do such things. So, I have to modify my behavior somewhat so that I appear to be a productive member of society when I leave my home. This leads me to the purpose of my post today. A rant... that's right, I am not ALWAYS sunshine, rainbows and buckets of puppies.... from time to time my cage gets rattled. I was out tonight, burning up some minutes at the local shop-for-crap store. I wandered through the store at a relaxing pace, plucking various items from the shelves that caught my eye or piqued my curiosity, while singing aloud to the generic tunes coming from the overhead speakers..... enjoying Elton John a little more than I should. I paid for my chosen delights, and hopped into the Corvalier and began my journey home. I rounded the 20 MPH curve near my home at my usual 60 MPH pace, while white-knuckling the steering wheel, screaming "hang on baby" and fighting the G force. Okay, that's a lie... I was going 22, there were no G's or white knuckles... but I really was yelling "Hang on baby!!!" (it's a Cavalier.. it's necessary). Anyway, shortly after that corner is where things went awry.... there was a "car" coming out of the street to the left. It was a Crown Vic, sitting roughly 6 inches higher than it should have been, and it was purple. Can we guess where this is going?? I'm ALL FOR blingin' out a ride.... slappin some righteous dubs on your whip, but who the fuck (that's right I said it.... I pulled the pin on the "f" grenade) came up with idea to put SPINNERS on a car???

As I came around the corner and approached the street to the left, half of my brain assured me that the Crown Vic had indeed stopped at the stop sign.... the other half of my brain, which readily recognizes shiny things (and subsequently prompts the drooling).... apparently exploded. My body decided (completely on it's own) that it would be much more interesting to listen to the half of my brain that said... "Hey dumbass, that car's not going to stop". It started a chain reaction that resulted in at least 6 citizens believing I was having a small stroke. As I came to a screeching halt in the middle of the road, I made a jogger skitter to and fro like a frightened squirrel, I sent a rather attractive, shirtless man and his dog running for the nearest bush, and bowed up a very large Chevy truck behind me. Sorry for the flat spots dude! I was absolutely impressed with my reaction time, and my ability to come to a quick, clean stop on a wet road.... but that all went away when I realized that it was not the car itself that was still moving... it was merely the wheels. There was clearly no reason for me to be stopped in the middle of an unimpeded lane of travel. I looked like an ass, and I felt like an ass... I was an ass. I sincerely hope that the passers-by chalked it up to a medical condition, and not a meth-induced halucination. Judging by the looks on their faces, unfortunately, I think they were all convinced of the latter.

So, to sum up my neurotic ramblings, I firmly beleive that spinners should be stricken from our public roads. They are dangerous in certain situations. Had the guy behind me not been paying attention, I would have been punted into the nearest ditch.... for no good reason.

That's my rant. They are few and far between, and now that I've expressed my opinion, I can return to my usual, sunny self. (Pfffttt)

Time for a beer!!!

Until next time......

Rubb'er Down :)

Kristen